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Company Slogan: Death to you all!
"Giving it your all... then working harder" is a slogan on a slideshow that runs repeatedly on the TV's in the Generation Support Building at the plant. But does this slogan mean anything? Is it even possible? I say, "No, what they are asking is impossible". Consider this:
Giving it your all would mean working at 100% of your capacity to work. Working more than your theoretical maximum would mean death; the human body cannot take such work. Also, think of lunch breaks and the necessary time one spends staring at a monitor or updating one's blog. Both of those would add up to about 60%. Thus, on a given day, I do about 40% of my maximum capacity.
If I "gave it my all" I would operate at maximum, thus having no lunch, no starting at a monitor, and no blog breaks. I would not leave for the bathroom either. Doing this for 9 hours would be very harsh on one's body. Thus, working harder than "giving it your all" would be so strenuous on one's body, the strain would cause one's body to fail. If every day you worked harder than the previous day, and on the first day you gave it your all, worked very close to 100%, you would eventually die or go insane. Thus I must conclude that the nuclear power plant I work at wants to promote insanity in its workers. I cannot really make much of why they would want to kill us, other than it makes upper management's job much easier when it comes to layoff's.
So next time before creating some ridiculus statement and displaying it on many monitors for your employees to see, think about what will happen if some guy with free time reads too deeply into it.
Disclaimer: The above is completly satire and should not be taken literally.
Belched up with tidings of comfort and joy by Joe
at
7:59:00 AM. |
